Do you ever feel lonely? Most nights I put the kids to bed by myself, eat dinner with the kids (sans David), go to bed alone, and well... most my days it is me and the kids. Don't get me wrong... I love my kids and the time I get to spend with them... but sometimes it is lonely. I dream for the day when David has a real schedule that allows "us" time again. I miss the time of just sitting next to each other after the kids are in bed. Both exhausted... but at least exhausted together. Someday... maybe.
I am so behind on so many things that it is overwhelming. I have so much to "document" on here... like Alexis first day of school, our epic summer vacation, our garden project, and so much more. When I get so far behind on things I avoid them. I guess that is why I haven't posted for awhile. Not to mention that all my pictures are on an external hard drive, that isn't attached to this computer, because our laptop died. When it rains, it pours around here... I swear... I think that everything hits the fan at once, and financially it is no bueno.
On the bright side, it is cooling down. Today's high was only 95 and tomorrow is going to be a cool 100. I keep pretending it is nice out now that is is the end of September, only to be reminded the second I open the door and am hit with the lovely desert air. The trees here don't change colors. They go from green to brown leaves on the ground overnight. No transition. I miss the colors.
The phrase "grow where you're planted" keeps coming to mind. I guess it is time to figure things out and make the best of them... even if it means getting lonely and living in the desert.
3 comments:
I so understand.
I know my sister struggled with the same thing, her husband is a dr. I don't know what your answer will be. Just know that you have a lot of extended family that loves you, and would be happy to support you. You and your sweet ones are welcome here, and if you need some movie buddies, we're willing to come to you after bedtime :-)I know we don't replace your David, but sometimes it's nice to have company....
That is our schedule, too, and has been off and on our entire marriage, and will be for a while still, so I completely understand. Hang in there and find the memories you can make with the kids that they will remember when they grow old.
Post a Comment